The other day an ex-colleague of mine, who has just been transferred at my hometown, called me saying he was feeling rather unwell. Like all Good Samaritan, I felt it was my duty to call on him. So, I dropped at his place and enquired him about his health. He was complaining of dizziness. I being the sort of person who had none of a business infringing upon other people’s profession, but would still like to be helpful or would I rather say step in other people’s shoe, tried to diagnose what was wrong with him. It was thus that I felt it customary to ask him about his medical history – blood pressure, diabetes, heart problems, he was sure he had none. I next asked him if he felt nauseated. C’mon, I am not pregnant, he joked. All the same I feel it is gas, he said. I next asked him what he had eaten the previous night. Not much, he replied, just ½ a kilo of mutton. “Mutton! I exclaimed, where did you purchase it?” “Oh! Just from the vendor selling meat around the corner on the street” he replied. I am certain you are having food poisoning, I said with firm conviction. How can you be so sure, I do not have any loose motion? You surely will have, I replied, you know how unhygienic it is, god only knows, how old was the meat. Reluctantly he seemed to agree and said Admi kha ke hi marta hai, nahin khne se koi nahin marta - “people die of gluttony, people don’t die if they don’t go without food”.
What he said struck me. There was certain irony in the words. Who have heard of a person dying of overeating? All the same we hear of people dying of hunger. There are millions of people who go hungry everyday. For them it is a question of getting a morsel of grub. At the end of the day if they get their morsel, they go content and sleep their worries off. Those who don’t get their morsel, sleep with the pangs of hunger in their stomach and dream to see a better day. Certainly these people don’t die. Unless, off course, there is an epidemic or a famine.
I am reminded by the harsh reality of my friend’s words, for it is the poor who does not suffer from gluttony, but we who indulge in gluttony. It is not that this is not averse to our health. We know it pretty well but we still love to indulge in these extra pleasantries. For some it is compulsion. For some it is a way of life in the society to be seen as well off. Still it is the frivolities of life, without which we certainly could learn to live with. But we choose to live with it, like we choose to live with the many health problems concerning us. Certainly there are lessons to be learnt from our forefathers and fathers, but do we? We do seem to be acutely aware of the complications of a well fed life and overindulgence in the certain extra frivolities should I say we dare not enjoy in our life- be it good food, cloths et al.
It was therefore no surprise that I took it very lightly when I was diagnosed with diabetes mellitus several months back. Everyone was concerned except me. I could still see my mothers amazed look when I said ‘I knew I would be likely to have the disease, since dad had it and before dad my granddad had the same problem’. She said in anguish “don’t you ever take anything seriously”
I was always a person who would like and try to grab some attention for him. As such I like it when everyone in the family have suddenly become so concerned about me. Before the disease happened I think I was sharing what much my family members used to have on their dining table, and as such was to be content with whatever they ate without any grumble. Now I don’t have to grumble anymore for what I get to eat they don’t eat and what they get to eat I don’t get any!
I glee at the comparison my mother often makes me of my late dad and myself. ‘You are much like your dad’, she would say, no control on the eating habits! It reminded me of the times when my dad had certain tiff with my mom and would refuse to eat. He would sometime pick me up from school. One day he was very generous in treating me on the way to home at the nearby restaurant. I was very happy and told everyone at home, how nice dad was to treat me like that. ‘It is because; he had a tiff with mom and did not have any meal at home’ told my eldest sister. I would reflect on our idiosyncrasies as we often used to sulk and refuse food inspite of constant goading of our mom, who would soon tire in her persuasion, and then we would hope she would ask once more to us to have our food and we reluctantly but willingly heed her.
The disease it seems has brought back those innocent biddings and idiosyncrasies. Otherwise how would you explain how I enjoy the frivolities that have come with it? Like I enjoy it when my sister in law adds a generous helping on my plate. I do enjoy when my mom asks if I had my stomach full, although she pretty well knows I am taking only one quarter of what I used to eat before. I now enjoy it when my wife forgets to give my daily medicine, and I harangue her about neglecting me. I now enjoy it when friends and colleagues are a bit taken aback when I refuse to go to a restaurant or a party. I now enjoy it when someone remembers and bring me a tea or a coffee without sugar at my workplace.
I do take some matters seriously sometimes, but most of the things are as simple as being accepted as a part of life. Like the fact that if I die, it would be because of my indulgence in this unavoidable pleasantries of life. No, I am not being pensive nor do I pity myself. But the fact of the matter is there before me. It stares harshly everyday in the morning cup of tea I drink. Who would not love to drink their tea with that blend of the sweetness of sugar and strong flavour of fresh tea? How would you like to taste a cup of tea with a bland taste devoid of sweetness? Even the tealeaf taste bland. Some say sweet is the key to happiness. How would one explain our exemplary behaviour in going all out to woo your sweetheart or your sulking child with a piece of chocolate? Certainly there is truth in the saying. Sweetness is to happiness as much as sugar is necessary in our daily life to give us that energy.
“Sadly enough it is these sweet little thing called sugar which the body is not able to break down, because your body cannot produce enough insulin or just stopped producing it. It is here that the sugar creates havoc with your body function, as the extra sugar is pumped directly into your blood stream and your body has to do extra effort to flush it out. In the long run diabetes mellitus can affect the liver, kidneys, the heart and other vital body organs. There is no cure for diabetes. It is best controlled through controlled diet, so that your body produces enough sugar which can be broken down…”
So, the doctor told me when I he gave me my blood test report and diagnosed with ‘type II’ diabetes mellitus. “You should follow your diet chart and exercise tips seriously, and watch out your weight”. That was 8 months back. I had lost considerable weight then around 56 kgs down from my 70 kg.
It is a shame that I am following my doctors advice, so much seriously so that I eat only thrice a day, work from 9.00 to 8.00 pm sitting on a desk, before a computer, hop on a bus to get to my workplace, and my weight is now at a healthy 70 kg, and I am only 39!
I am consciously aware of this and still love the frivolities that life throws up now and then. But then I have learned to live with the frivolities, those idiosyncrasies, those thought every night when you go to sleep that you will wake up early in the morning and go for a jog, or those thought that you would cut down on the little extra helpings. These things are a part of me. Like when my wife walked out of my life, because she could not share a life where I left my old job, and started a new chapter, at my hometown just to be with them, and my mom’s foreboding “son, think of the innocent child”, and I replied, “mom, its better, if he do not remember his father’s face, for when he grows up he will have to live without a father”. I do not know whether she could catch the cruelty of those words, but she thought it as just another idiosyncrasies of mine.
I was given a booklet by a doctor friend with the title “Diabetes – Learn to live with it” The book was like anyone of those which a medical sales representative gives to his prospective client. One thing which caught my attention was the words “diabetes has to be learned to be lived with, it is not a disease but part of your life you have no control of” Like everyone else maligned by this disease, I try to live with it and I know all the frivolities and my idiosyncrasies will still live with me. Those who do live a life of diabetes will agree, no matter how they try to take control of the disease, it is not going to go away, it will become a part of you. Even if I used to eat, and liked to eat it is with no regret that I eat what is good for me and I enjoy it all the frivolities it throws up with it. It is this sweetness of life knowing that there is always someone caring about you, that leaves no bitter taste.